a word about these past 3-6-5

I can't believe it, but it was one year ago today that we hopped on a plane to move our lives to Haiti. How can it have already been a year? Time seems to have stopped from June until about this past April, because life as we knew it was so different. Now that it's summer again, I find myself thinking of and missing Haiti almost every day. The heat, the smell of gasoline, the busyness of city dwellers as I walk through the streets- it all awakens glimpses of memories of our every day lives there. I remember so much about each day so perfectly, it doesn't seem that 365 days have already come and gone...

measuring your strength

"When the path before you is dotted with difficulties, beware of measuring your strength against those challenges. That calculation is certain to riddle you with anxiety... Regardless of the day's problems, (He) can keep you in perfect peace as you stay close to (Him)."
-Sarah Young, Jesus Calling


Image found here //

the little piece of heaven

What was your summer routine when you were growing up? Both of my brothers are at camp this week, and it seems that with each summer that passes I miss it just a little more. I was able to be a part of camp for 16 years, and after 5 years of full time counseling and with marriage on the horizon, I was ready to call it quits. Now, as I see my brother spending his summers as a full time counselor, I am reminded of the sense of family amongst campers, counselors, and workers, and the beauty in the calm of each morning before the crazy begins.

I also miss the time away from the world, with some of my best friends just a cabin away. After the directors of 20+ years stepped down and a new couple took their place, the next generation has risen to call camp their home. They've created a new space, with new trends and personalities and activities. But the same will be true for everyone- a safe haven to connect with God and grow to love Him more deeply. 

And one more memory just for fun... ;)

xo

light and peace

"... to shine on those living in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the path of peace."

Luke 1:79

What a beautiful and powerful image! Jesus came to free us all from darkness and death. Thank you, God, for shining the light on me in the darkness. I am so thankful to not be enslaved to it, and to have Him as my guide on the path of peace.

xo

Image found here //

good to wait

So much waiting for us. I've never felt more lack of control in my life than I have this past year. It's a constant cycle of learning to trust in the Father, and to cling to His perfect love and timing. I hope this quotes reaches those who are also in this waiting game.

Some bright flowers for this gloomy day :)

xo

P.S. Some other great "waiting" quotes.

Image Source // 1. C.S. Lewis // 2. Spring Flowers //

He does not abandon

"When the angel of the Lord appeared to Gideon, he said, 'The Lord is with you, mighty warrior.' 'But sir,' Gideon replied, 'if the Lord is with us, why has all this happened to us? Where are all his wonders that our fathers told us about when they said, 'Did not the Lord bring us up out of Egypt?' But now the Lord has abandoned us and put us into the hand of Midian.' The Lord turned to him and said, 'Go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian's hand. Am I not sending you?'"
                                                                                 Judges 6:12-14

I don't really have a great epiphany, and I'm not really sure what to make of God's response here in regards to my own life. But, I find comfort in Gideon's response. The exact thoughts I've had and words I've prayed, as we have been in this challenging and unstable position for almost a year, now. Not having clear answers or direction, not being in a great situation, not feeling settled. Almost a year of this leads you to wonder "Has God forgotten me?" You know it's not true, but your heart and mind can't help but feel distant and alone. It's reassuring to find scripture that seems to come right from your heart- even if it doesn't give you an answer or solve your problems, there's peace in knowing that you are understood.

When things are going great, or when life seems to constantly hit dead ends and meet closed doors- He is still there. He is still just as involved in your life, even when you're fleeting heart can't sense Him. It's your fear, feelings, and faith that change and move up and down- not Him. He is unchanging, His love is everlasting. He is present, He is intimately and intricately involved.

"Hear my voice when I call, O Lord;
   be merciful to me and answer me.
My heart says of you, 'See his face!'
   Your face, Lord, I will seek.
Do not hide your face from me,
   do not turn your servant away in anger;
   you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
   O God my Savior.
Though my father and mother forsake me,
   The Lord will receive me.
Teach me your way, O Lord;
   lead me in a straight path
   because of my oppressors.
Do not turn me over to my foes,
   for false witnesses rise up against me,
   breathing out violence.

I am still confident of this:
   I will see the goodness of the Lord
   in the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
   be strong and take heart
   and wait for the Lord."

     { Psalm 27: 7-14 }


Image found here //

thankful thinking

"A thankful mindset keeps you in touch with [Him]." - Sarah Young, Jesus Calling

How can you protect your joy today and be close to Him? Don't let negativity steal the full joy and complete closeness that He offers you daily. Reflecting on and reminding myself of this today.

xo

P.S. I have been craving a good camping trip- doesn't this picture sum it up beautifully?? :)

Image found here //

washed clean

"Trust Me enough to accept the full forgiveness that I offer you continually. 

This great gift, which cost Me My Life, is yours for all eternity."

- Jesus Calling, Sarah Young

Thank you, God, for 8 full years of the precious gift of forgiveness and renewal.

Image found here //

light and laughter

"Don't take yourself so seriously. Lighten up and laugh with Me. You have Me on your side, so what are you worried about? I can equip you to do absolutely anything, as long as it is My will."

- Jesus Calling (Sarah Young)

What a great perspective on anxiety- I never would have thought to approach my nerves regarding a certain upcoming situation in this way. Laugh about it. Enter it confidently and securely. God leads the way. You are safe in Him. 

xo

Image found here //

faith continues to rejoice in Him

I read this scripture this morning and felt it connected to yesterday's post. God is our joy, our salvation, our strength, and our hope no matter our circumstance- even when all signs point to loss and discouragement. He is the constant merciful and loving Father. 

"Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, there there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights." - Habakkuk 3:17-19

xo

Image via here //

birthday scripture love

I got an idea from a good friend, who, each year on her birthday, reads the chapter and verse of each book in the Bible of the month and day she was born on. For example, my birthday is 02/04, so I would read the 2nd chapter and 4th verse in each book. Isn't this a cute and fun idea? It feels like each scripture was hand-picked for you and your special day, and you get to read it and think about why it was chosen. Though I've done it before, yesterday while I was reading, many of the scriptures were so moving. It was special for me to read so many powerful scriptures in one sitting, and to be reminded of the stories and the character of God. Here are a few that stood out to me...

enduring patience

"There may be faith which never complained or questioned; 

but still greater is the faith which was tortured by questions and still believed."

     -William Barclay

In the moments in your life when you think God has forgotten, cling to the remnants of faith- you will see His kindness and mercy.

xo

Image found here //

beautiful peace

"But I am like an olive tree flourishing in the house of God; I trust in God's unfailing love for ever and ever."
                                           {Psalm 52:8}

I was reading through some scriptures this morning, and was struck by the beauty in this particular passage. Not only the imagery of the first part, but even the confidence of the writer in the second segment. It's not "I will" or "I try", but, "I do." It's easy to think this kind of confidence is pride or arrogance, but being sure of your confidence in God is purely humble, peaceful, and reassuring. I also looked up a few olive tree images, and now I'm wishing I lived near a grove- what objects of such beauty and peace!

xo

Images found here, here, and here //

unexpected plans

"When your plans our thwarted, be on the lookout for [God]. [He] may be doing something important in your life, something quite different from what you expected. It is essential at such times to stay in communication with [Him], accepting [His] way as better than yours. Don't try to figure out what is happening. Simply trust [Him] and thank [Him] in advance for the good that will come out of it all."
                                                  - "Jesus Calling"

"As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it."
                                                    - Isaiah 55:10-11

Image found here //

guarded by His peace

   

     Recently I have expressed concern that through this time of waiting, my heart feels that it is hardening towards God. The frustration that comes with waiting and not being in control, as well as the fear and doubt in His timing and love, adds up and creates distance between me and my Heavenly Father. I feel vulnerable and therefore want to put up my walls and shut down. I've been praying and asking God to keep my heart soft, for I know that I truly do not want to be separated from Him and His perfect love. It's just hard to feel that in these times. 

     Anyways, all that to say, I read these scriptures this morning and was comforted by the reassurance that His peace (which transcends understanding) will guard my heart from hardening, and I was refocused on Jesus enduring the cross so that I do not have to grow weary in waiting. If you are experiencing a challenging or frustrating situation, I hope these words speak to you as well. 

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
                                                                                                     Philippians 4:6-7

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."
                                                                                                     Hebrews 12:2

xo

Top Image found here // 

to live each day

"A thankful, trusting attitude helps you to see events in your life from My perspective… Resist your tendency to search for the easiest route through the day. Be willing to follow wherever I lead. No matter how steep or treacherous the path before you, the safest place to be is by My side."

- Calling Jesus, Sarah Young

rethinking your strength

Ever heard the phrase, "God won't give you more than you can handle"? I stumbled across this blog post yesterday and wanted to share it- the writer disagrees with this common offer of reassurance, as it is to be found nowhere in scripture. (The scripture this phrase stems from is in the context of sin and temptation, not of sorrow and heartbreak.) It's surprisingly comforting to discover, yes, He sure will give you more than you can handle- it's in these times that our strength truly comes from Him. What do you think about this perspective?

Follow the link here to read more: "God will give you more than you can handle: I guarantee it."

(Photo of Lake Michigan sent to me yesterday by a friend visiting home in Chicago!)

not the anchor, but the boat

In times of sorrow and trouble, we feel the need for God even more. But the reality is, our need for him is ever-present, regardless of our feelings or situation. Our need for him is infinitely unceasing and unchanging. 

Image Found here // 

let me hear Your whisper // how to make decisions

Do you want to know how to make big life decisions? 

Me too :)

I don't have an answer. I don't know if there will ever be anyone that can provide the exact perfect formula. But as we all try to figure that formula out, I do have a few thoughts. I'm learning, as always, to keep my heart drawing closer to Him…

{Click the link below for more}

saying goodbye

Friday morning, at the age of 82, my Poppop left this present world. This past year has been a long, hard battle both for him and his family, and while his passing brings mourning and sadness, it also brings peace- because he was a good man who loved the Lord and led his family to do so, and because he is no longer trapped in a old, dying body. I am filled with sincere joy as I imagine being able to see him again one day, but for who he truly is, in a body that is alive and strong. 

There is a photo from when I was about 5 or 6 of him teaching me to rollerblade, hand in hand, our backs to the camera. We reenacted the shot at our wedding, and they will always be framed side by side in whichever house Andrew and I call home. He was a special man who loved his grandkids deeply.

I am so proud of this family for their resilience and strength over the last couple of months. With the recent passing of Uncle Hank, and now PopPop, we've shared some really tough moments; it will be tough for a while. But I am filled with more love for each of the 17 (now 18, with A), and already feel even more bonded and connected to them. Man, it is good to have a wonderful family!

Along with 9 (plus Andrew) grandkids, 2 sons, and 3 daughters-in-law, Poppop leaves behind his beloved bride of 63 years. The left picture is of their wedding day, and the right was taken just a week ago. They remained by each other's sides and shared the deepest love right into his death, and I believe even death can't take that love away; it will cross right over into eternity with him. I have been so impressed by Grammy and her faithfulness to God, constantly clinging to His promises and striving for peace that passes understanding.

My good friend, Gayle, also had her grandmother pass away this weekend. Her and I have shared and bonded over some similar life moments, transitions, and feelings this year. Please be praying for her and her family as well as they reflect on and rejoice over a life well lived, and mourn the loss of her presence.

It is such a good gift to have family that we can love- I think the sadness and how much we miss our loved ones only reveals how deep and special the love really is. I am so grateful because it means I have people to love and to love me back. 

The memories I will hold onto are:

-Every year up until about 9th grade, begging and going with Poppop and Dad to the golf course the day after Thanksgiving just so I could drive the golf cart.

-Poppop telling me, whenever he got a hair cut, that he got into a fight with a lawn mower. 

-His infamous "25 by 85" speech (wanting 25 people in our family by the time he is 85. There are currently 18, so we've got 3 years to contribute another 7 ;) )

-At every holiday event, we all had to spend at least an hour doing karaoke, which he would record on cassette tapes, and then play back and listen to (on his own) immediately after our jam session, while we were all still there...

-The feeling of his big, tough, weathered, wrinkly, veiny hands and how to me, he always smelled of listerine and cologne

"Soon we'll reach the shining river, soon our pilgrimage will cease, soon our happy hearts will quiver with the melody of peace…"

xo

First 3 images by Gracie Blue Photography